A Letter to My Friends

Dearest Friends:

The quarantine and furlough have been rough. I'm tired and while I've held up pretty well for two and a half months, I'm starting to crumble a bit. And it's not for lack of things to do - I have plenty to keep me busy until Fall. I miss seeing you. I miss hearing your voices. I miss your diverse personalities - even the irritating ones. I miss your unique perspectives on various issues. I learn a lot from you.

Now, once again, we have a situation of police brutality against an African American man in Minneapolis. I don't understand how this is still happening in our country. Have we learned nothing from the past? My heart breaks over this. I'm not saying this to be politically correct. Hopefully, you know me better than that. I think, what if this man were your husband, brother, father, son, boyfriend? You know I would be there for you, arms wrapped around you as tight as you will let me (social distancing be damned). I would cry with you and pray with you and beg God to ease your pain. It would be personal for me, because you are my friends.

I would hope you would do the same for me. However, we all know that may never happen because I'm white. I'm sorry about my privilege. If I could share it with you, I would in a heartbeat. In truth, there shouldn't be a thing called white privilege. We Americans are all covered by the same Constitution; yet, the administration of our guaranteed rights is subject to the color of our skin. This is wrong.

The current administration is doing nothing to comfort our nation that is grieving in so many ways. The healing and repairs needed will have to come from the people. All of us. This means we must all stand together against unjust practices, root out corruption, and, most importantly, vote in every election. Every election -  from the local school board to the Presidency. Keeping up with all this can be tedious. I agree. I'm busy, too. However, I fear that our "busyness" is how we got to where we are today.

My dear friends, I want you to know that I care about you, love and miss you dearly, and hope to see all of you soon, if life ever returns to "normal." Like you, I just want to live my life in peace, earn a descent living, and be surrounded by a loving family and friends. I value each and every one of you.

Prayers and Blessings,

Elizabeth

Our New Normal?

I think by now everyone is tired of hearing anything related to the global pandemic, the COVID-19, aka the Coronavirus. As we all know, most of the world is shut down because of this deadly pandemic, and for good reason. People have died from this invisible thing. I am among the many who are taking the extra steps to washing my hands longer, using hand sanitizer a bit more, and watching my own health so that I don't bring germs home to my husband who has compromised immunity.

Macy's has closed shop for two weeks, which means I'm on an unplanned vacation with minimal pay. I'm grateful for something, so I guess I shouldn't complain. I'm using this time to catch up on housework, my craft projects, writing, and reading. Cooking will increase and new recipes will be tried. Already I discovered Irish soda bread and it is really good. I don't know if this is a new thing, but if not, I wonder if my Irish ancestors ever made it.

Jack is watching all his favorite shows, which are not all my favorite shows. When I read that a movie that I hadn't seen since I was a girl was on Amazon Prime, I powered up my laptop and settled in for Rogers & Hammerstein's "Cinderella." This is the one with Leslie Ann Warren and was made in 1965. I remember sitting in front of our black & white television and watching, absolutely glued, to the show and the music. I also remember fleeing to my mother's lap in tears when the step-mother and step-sisters were so mean to Cinderella. I remember dreaming of dancing a waltz with my Prince Charming; this dream stayed with me well into adulthood. Yes, I found my Prince Charming, but he can't waltz if his life depended on it. Oh well, he has many other wonderful qualities.

While the world is grinding to a halt, or seems to be, I want to share some thoughts that bring hope for a brighter future.

• Trucks are still delivering goods to market (I saw quite a few on the highway yesterday)
• Babies are still being born (Gotta love those baby smiles and giggles)
• Parents and teachers will truly work together to educate children
• We are more cognizant of how we impact the vulnerable among us
• You really don't know how strong you are until being strong is the only thing you have

Dear readers, we will weather this just as we have gotten through rough times in our past. We have survived tornadoes, earthquakes, fires, severe recessions, and gas shortages. We will get through this. Better and stronger.

Macy's. You're Killing Me

Just shy of a year ago, I was promoted to a new position that was supposed to enhance sales within Macy's. This was a corporate sponsored position, which means that select stores across the country would have dedicated personnel to provide more personalized customer service. I and three other women (whom I've known for years) were chosen for this role at our store. While I had my doubts about my level of patience required for this position, I accepted it as a challenge. Over the course of the following months, I purchased better quality clothing and shoes to reflect my new role. I wanted this position to succeed and dressing the part was an important ingredient.

Yeah.

Right off the bat, all four of us were tasked with running racks of clothing back to where they belonged, cleaning and folding merchandise, covering lunch breaks and department shortages. Pretty much everything EXCEPT one-on-one sales. The business cards we were supposed to get never materialized. My better wardrobe was a risk of being ruined, so I stopped wearing them and dressed down. I addressed my concerns with our store vice president at the time. He assured me that once staffing was at optimal levels, we would be freed up to do our new jobs. News update: he retired a few months later. And staffing never increased. Meanwhile, we heard rumors that other people in our position at other locations were allowed to perform their job duties. The new store vice president only lasted four months before she quit. She was nice, but politely ignored us. The next new store vice president promised to meet with us after inventory was over.

Inventory just finished. So were our jobs.

For now, I'm still employed at Macy's.  Kind of a "Girl Friday" way. Pretty much as I have been for the past year. Come Spring, they will roll out a "new" recovery team for the whole store. We've had a recovery team in the past and it didn't last long. So, it looks like I may have another year with Macy's before they decide to lay me off. I could have accepted the severance package that was also offered to me, but I want to leave on my terms, not Macy's.

Here's what is getting at me. The previous position was never given a chance to work. We never had management buy-in. We were never truly permitted to do our jobs as they were described to us. I can't enhance sales if I'm running go-backs all day. I can't escort a hapless customer to the right department if I'm tethered to a cash register. I had a few ideas of how to make these positions more productive and customer-centric. I had a couple of success stories I wanted to share.

Gone.

I've seen this with some of the other positions the management team dreamed up. Brand/Department specialists - no longer around. Shop Captains - never had any teeth to the position. Bridal consultants - gone. It seems that someone dreams up these things but no one has any investment in the idea. I feel my time (not to mention my money) has been wasted.

The easy answer here is to find another job. Well, things are more complicated than that in our household. Due to my husband's increasing health issues, now I'm on intermittent family leave. This is so I can be available to help my husband when he needs me and not lose my job. While I'm on FMLA, I am not allowed to look for another job, nor can I be self-employed. So, my hands are tied for the foreseeable future.

All I can do is take one day at a time. I have to trust God on this and leave it in His hands.

But, I'm still mad.

End of Year Ramblings

Here we are again, saying goodbye to another year and getting ready to greet a new one. I've seen a few references on Facebook about returning to the Roaring Twenties with pictures of flapper girls. While the reference is cute, let's not forget what happened at the end of that decade. Not a fun time and best not repeat it. Even so, I look at those flapper girls and remember that my mother's generation would be about 100 years old now.

2019 was a busy year for us. Busier than I realized since I discovered I hadn't made any blog entries for most of the year. Sorry about that.

I got a job promotion at Macy's - at least that's what it sounded like. I'm no longer assigned to one register and ring out customers. I'm supposed to move about the floor, helping customers with product questions and assist in enhancing their purchases. More one on one sales. This sounded interesting and challenging. The reality has become that I'm lunch relief, department coverage when people don't show up for work, fulfillment help, rack runner, and clean up crew. I'm not happy.

This year we lost three pieces of our hearts. Our senior cat, Rocky, died last June of bladder cancer. He was 17 years old. During the course of his lifetime, he helped our kids get through a lot of life challenges. He was an emotional support cat before it was a thing.  We also lost my husband's aunt. She was a petite lady who was amazingly up on the latest technology. Not bad for someone born almost a hundred years ago. We also lost his mother a month after her sister passed. Irene was a phenomenal cook and I believe my kids picked up her innate ability to put together delicious foods right off the top of their heads.

We gained a new family member - a tiny rescue kitty who we named Casper. Actually, Sami wanted Chicken Nugget, I wanted Vanilla Bean, but since Jackie was in charge of the kitten's care, he got naming rights. Sami gave him to us at Christmas. At only 6 weeks, he has been a fluffy ball of energy, curiosity, and entertainment. Miss Rosie, however, isn't so sure about this new family member.

Christmas morning greeted us with a glorious sunrise. While I have to sign off now to take care of household business, please enjoy the picture. Happy New Year to all!

Black Friday Explained

With the recent death of my mother-in-law, I'm on funeral leave on what is traditionally the biggest shopping weekend of the year. Now, my mother-in-law worked for a local department store for 25 years, so she was extremely familiar with the craziness of this annual ritual. If I didn't know any better, I would swear she planned her passing to give me the weekend off as her Christmas gift to me. Thanks, Mom. I really appreciate the gesture, but a gift card would have been fine.

This morning, while drinking my coffee and getting ready for the funeral in a few hours, I read through my Facebook posts. A writer I know in Texas posted that her husband is experiencing his first Black Friday in retail and wondered what the day will bring for him. She never shopped on Black Friday and a number of other friends echoed the same sentiments.

Well, allow me to educate you on the behavior of Americans on Black Friday. I have worked in retail for ten years at a major department store and three years at a local craft store. What I am about to share with you is from experience.

Shoppers act like the store is on fire.

They get mad because the item they came for has sold out.

They go ballistic because we ran out of shopping bags. Or gift boxes.

What? We don't gift wrap anymore?

Yes, I'll waive the shipping fee for you.

That item is on hold for another customer and no you can't have it.

No, we are not best friends and I won't risk my job to give you extra discounts. My real friends would never ask that of me.

Screaming at me will not get you better service.

Thirty-day return policy on Last Act items is store policy and I cannot waive that. If you think your gift recipient may want to return the gift, then don't shop Last Act. Or better, get a gift card.

Is destroying the whole store really necessary?

I am not your babysitter. Watch your own children.

The women's restrooms are in the juniors' department. Men's is downstairs in Levi's.

The shoe department and men's clothing are on the first floor.

No, I cannot give you an empty shopping bag because your paper bag from another store broke. Buy something here and I can give you a bag. (shoplifting red flag)

Today is Black Friday. There will be lines at every register. Deal with it.

I don't write store policy nor do I write the exclusions on the coupons. I just work here.

Turning yourself inside out being nice to the person behind you in line and then lashing out at me only reflects your hypocrisy, not my competence. Merry Christmas.


This is a short list, but hopefully you get the idea. Please be kind to the store clerks. Some are operating on a few hours of sleep and would rather be home than working today.

Merry Christmas and blessings to all!

A Letter to My Husband's Mother

Dear Irene:

Today you passed this world to a better place. Your months of suffering are over. You have the peace you so desired your whole life. Your family weeps your passing, but we know you are in God's hands now.

Ten years and ten days after Jim's passing, we face yet another empty place at the dining room table. Some of my fondest memories are the amazing meals you would put together. For years I begged you for your chili recipe. I remember the puzzled look on your face, as if I was asking how to boil water. When I finally found a recipe I was willing to swear was your recipe, you gave me a sly smile and told me, "I don't put ketchup in my chili."

Your deep love for your family was evident in everything you did. Preparing great meals was just part of the job. You sewed, quilted, cleaned, read bedtime stories, and refereed fights. You chauffeured, mopped runny noses, met with teachers, and greeted new boyfriends and girlfriends. You oversaw the care of your own mother-in-law and worked hard to ensure her last years were comfortable. You even fished a snake out of Jack's sleeping bag when he returned from a Boy Scout camping trip.

Thank you for giving me your son. In doing so, we gave you two grandchildren to add to your growing family. We love you and will miss you terribly. Sleep well, dear lady.

Much love,

Elizabeth
your daughter-in-law

Christmas 2018

Merry Christmas and Blessings for the coming New Year!

Last night I left at the end of my shift at Macy's absolutely euphoric. I got through another Christmas shopping season - one that I went into deeply depressed and burned out. I had greeted the first few weeks crying almost every day. I snapped and snarled at my co-workers. My husband was on the verge of taking me to the hospital. That's how bad it was. But, last night. Christmas Eve. It was done. I sang "White Christmas" at the top of my lungs as I left the building. (Keep in mind, I can't carry a tune in a bucket.) My manager and our store vice president joined me in song. I couldn't tell you if they sang on key - I was busy drowning them out. I probably caused some ears to bleed. I probably cracked some glass somewhere. But I didn't care. Eight Christmases at Macy's. I made it.

During the holiday shopping season, my hours usually increase quite a bit. I sometimes end up working 7 to 9 days straight with no break. This year was dramatically different. We went into the season severely short-staffed and the 90 or so seasonals we hired quit as fast as they came through the door. The tiny handful that stayed really weren't enough to provide coverage for everyone else. We had 15 call-offs on one day alone. That was felt painfully by the staff as well as customers.

This year the scheduling gods reached out to all employees earlier than usual (September) to ask that we clear our calendars. This meant full time employees had to give up their assigned one day off a week. Many of us were furious. My manager assured me that I would still have two days off a week, but not the day I had always planned. Once the holiday schedules rolled out, I thought there must have been a mistake. I had every Saturday in December off. Plus two Sundays. How did I get that?! Not complaining - I thought this was great! Now I can actually enjoy the holidays and do holiday stuff with the rest of the world on the weekend. Like normal people. I contacted my manager to make sure this wasn't some joke. She told me she had no control over the schedules, but if I would be willing to pick up shifts on some of those Saturdays, she would appreciate it. I joked with her that I was her favorite. I gleefully enjoyed having Saturdays off, but my hours didn't increase exponentially like the past.

Well, I toured a historic house in Florissant that was decked out for the holidays. My husband and I went to St. Charles to watch the Christmas parade on Main Street. We made time to put some pine boughs on my father-in-law's grave. And another Saturday found me sleeping all day in the recliner.

Customers were about the same, though. Cranky, crabby and demanding. One customer, after buying only two items, demanded 10 boxes. I politely explained our store policy of only one box per item purchased. He got mad. "Ah come on, lady! I got all these presents to wrap." Yeah, dude, you and everybody else. I gave him a total of seven boxes, but I know he went to other registers and made the same demands. Another customer came up to me and asked about plus sized women's underwear. I asked what size she wore. He said, "I don't know. Her butt is this big" and spread out his hands to just past his hips. Why me? Then, we have the customers who seem to think they are in a bar and toss their credit cards at me while ordering their purchase. So tempted to ask if they want a beer chaser.

We hosted the family Christmas dinner this year. Since there's only five of us, this was no big deal. However, this year, we pulled out most of the stops on decorations. This was the most decorating we have done in over five years. I cooked for three days. The boys and I cleaned the house. I even folded napkins to look like Christmas trees. The menu was larger than we have had in a few years. Turkey, corn bread, green beans, sweet potato casserole, twice baked potato casserole, cranberry jello salad, broccoli grape salad, and banana cream pie for dessert.

Tonight I'm reflecting on all that is around me. I think my relatives who have passed away would have been proud of me. I hope my kids are proud of me. I believe this Christmas was extraordinary.

Merry Christmas!!!

The Rape of Our Democratic Republic

During the Senate hearings of sexual assault allegations against then Supreme Court nominee, Brett Kavanaugh, a political cartoon was published that has seared it's way into my mind. The cartoon shows Lady Justice being pinned down by a pair of male arms with the Republican Party elephant image as cuff links. Bruce MacKinnon is the artist behind this drawing which appeared in The Chronicle Herald, a Canadian based newspaper.



https://www.thestar.com/news/canada/2018/09/30/halifax-cartoonists-response-to-kavanaugh-hearing-goes-viral.html

My political leanings are thinly veiled, if at all. For the record, I'm just a nudge left of center. I'm willing to coexist with people whose ideals are different than mine, as long as they will coexist with me. I believe we should have universal health care for all. I believe not just in free education for all, but free quality education. I believe abortions will decrease if birth control is made readily available. I believe climate change is real and I believe the wealthy should pay a higher proportion of taxes.

I'm fed up with corporate and special interest ownership of our government. I'm tired of the one set of rules for me and another for everyone else. I lose patience with people who shout conspiracy theory on everything remotely close to our government. Flat Earthers need to open a book (assuming any know how to read). I'm just sick of stupid.

Doesn't it frighten you when the President of the United States suggests that the presidency should be a lifetime term?

Doesn't it bother you when that same man suggests that protests should be illegal? By the way, review the US Constitution on that idea. Go ahead. I'll wait.

The dangerous trajectory of our country can be stopped. We can turn things around and make our country a better and stronger union.

Get out and VOTE. However, go to the polls educated on the candidates and the issues. Don't vote for someone because he's good looking. Honestly, I think that's part of how former Missouri governor, Eric Greitens got into office.

While this is easy for me to say as I am parked in my recliner, if you can get involved in your community, do so. Get to know your neighbors, get in front of your local leaders and speak up on issues that matter to you. Volunteer at a shelter or a food pantry. Host a clothing drive, open a little library in a neighborhood park, read to children in a daycare.

If volunteering your time isn't an option, then start a business. Follow what interests you. Open a barber shop or start a community newspaper. Look around your community and see what's missing and fill that gap.

I want to see our country turn away from the brink of disaster. Extremism either left or right isn't good for anyone. We have the capability of fixing this. Let's get busy and be truly Americans.

Encouragement and Inspiration

Sometimes life surprises me. Sometimes I surprise myself. Let me explain.

Last week, a discussion on a local Facebook page, Rock Road Reporter, centered on the proposed licensing of a liquor store at a busy intersection at the edge of town. The abandoned shop had once been a machine shop and local residents were upset about the idea of another liquor store in town. The sentiment is understandable and one that I share. Overland doesn't need another liquor store. I posted my opinion about creating small businesses in the area and encouraged everyone to think creatively. The response was more whining and complaining. I felt my comments were being ignored.

The next day and about a dozen more posts complaining about a liquor store, I posted again - this time listing out small business ideas that may be suitable for that store location. Now, I got responses. Finally, instead of crying in the beer, people are talking about what businesses they want to see in Overland. I felt a sense of victory. Some posters came up with some pretty good ideas. Discussion became a bit more positive. Another poster, however, pointed out that if the liquor store owner has all the legal paperwork, ducks in a row, etc, there really isn't anything anyone can do about it. If you want the business to go away, just don't shop there. This poster has a valid point.

I hope, though, that I sparked a positive discussion in my community about bringing back Overland and North County. I truly believe that we all have the ability to make the area thrive once again. It just takes creative thinking and discussion.

Now, the other surprise came in the form of a wonderful meet-up with a former boss from a previous employer. She was so encouraging and gave me a lot of great ideas for growing my writing, and living a healthier life. I was so surprised with the content of the conversation, that I forgot to ask how I could help her grow her business. It was a lovely morning and a great conversation.

Thus inspired, I will march forward as a writer.

Glorious Beautiful Nature

The sunsets here in Missouri have been spectacular in recent weeks. I've been whipping out my camera when I can and trying to capture the awesome beauty above my head. Of course, scientists will tell you that these jaw dropping displays are the result of particles in the air from the erupting volcanoes in Hawaii. To watch the news reports on the mesmerizing footage of flowing lava and the gradual swallowing up of property and reshaping the island is nothing short of shocking. One is left speechless while witnessing the awesome power of Nature.

While I am able to capture our sunsets, our sunrises are another matter. They can't wait until I wake up. This morning turned out to be an exception.

Here's a bit of back story:

My senior cat, Rocky, has decided that one of my two pillows that I sleep on belongs to him. He will climb up on the bed and swat at my head to get me to move off his pillow. I finally gave up and placed the pillow in question on the foot of the bed, and snatched another pillow from my husband's side. Rocky now won't sleep ON the pillow, he sleeps beside it. This morning, our younger cat, Miss Rosie, decided that maybe Rocky was on to something pretty cool and pulled the same trick on me with the pillow I'm currently sleeping on. She's never been terribly interested in my pillows, so this is kind of a surprise. She didn't swat at my head. She just sat on my head. At 5:30. In. The. Morning. I propped myself up and looked from one cat to another. Really, you two?

Through the blinds, I noticed the morning light looked pink, so I threw on some jeans, grabbed my camera and dashed outside to capture the remnants of a lovely sunrise.

This morning's sunrise

Last night's sunset

Despite the turmoil in the world, beautiful displays such as these are a reminder that God is still watching over us. Have a great day!

Big Ambitions Bite

I haven't been able to keep up with the news lately. My work hours at Macy's have been comparable to holiday hours and when I get home, I'm too tired to notice much. That said, I don't know how I missed Missouri Governor Eric Greiten's resignation this week. HOLY COW!!! Pretty much a happy day - I've been wanting that boy to go down. Never liked him. His campaign ads were just too disturbing and his arrogance made my blood boil.

Political power is a scary thing and our Constitution is supposed to safeguard all Americans from those who would abuse their power. However, we are living in a frightening time in our country. We Missourians have witnessed the downfall of a man with political ambitions that crossed a lot of ethical lines. We have a President and a GOP controlled Congress who are more interested in getting richer than running our country. Ethics and morals are trivial things to these people.

It's a tragedy when the rich and powerful don't even bother to hide their greed.

Neither the Republicans nor the Democrats are angels. Both parties are corrupt. We as a people need to be more aware of who our political candidates are. Local elections can be boring stuff, but this is where we need to start. If the local mayor is held to a higher standard, then that will carry over to higher offices. Including the Presidency. Complacency got us to where we are. We need to stop being lazy about our elections and exercise our Constitutionally guaranteed rights to vote.

Now, more than ever, we need to address what is wrong and make it right again. We need to get big money out of our government. We need term limits on Congress. We need to get out and vote.

Goodbye 2017

Well, once again I sit in my living room on New Year's Eve (where I prefer to be) and contemplate the previous year's events.

2017 has been a mixed bag. Although, when you get right down to it, every year is a mixed bag. Here's my take on what 2017 was for me and my family - in no chronological order.

Big Jack's health spiraled downward with fainting spells that defied explanation, panic attacks that required two hospitalizations, uncontrolled blood sugar and mixing insulins that shouldn't be mixed. In the midst of all this, we managed to assemble a pretty good medical team this time and, hopefully, we can get him back on track. We discovered that he was eligible for a free Caption Call phone through Center for Hearing and Speech which made telephone conversations much easier for him. This was a true blessing. Now he has a way to call for help if he needs it. It's funny how I found out about it. If I hadn't walloped my ear while answering the telephone at work and worried over damaging my own hearing aid, I wouldn't have called to have it checked out. It's amazing how God works. By the way, my hearing aid is working just fine.

We lost my dear Aunt Dolores. She had just celebrated her 96th birthday. Dementia had taken over completely and I don't even know if she remembered who we were. I know she's in a better place and with the people she loved most, but we still miss her. We celebrated Christmas with a bit more energy than before and I believe she would have wanted it that way.

My daughter Sami started a new job at the local animal hospital. She's a receptionist but they are promising to train her to be a vet tech. We couldn't be more thrilled. I'm happy she isn't delivering pizzas anymore and she's in the field she loves.

I made a tiny foray into landscaping by plotting out a hosta garden in the back of the house. Hardly perfect and the weeds kept taking over, but it's still a good start. I was able to break up the large clumps of hosta bulbs and transplant them to other parts of the garden. I think it will look nice - eventually.

In April, I was transferred from the Jewelry Department to Active Wear on the second floor. This wasn't my decision and I was upset at first over being told I wasn't good enough for the new, redesigned Fine Jewelry Department. This also turned into a blessing. After a few months in my new department, I was hearing horror stories coming out of the jewelry department. The intense pressure, lack of organization, people quitting as fast as they got hired. I'm happy where I am now and have a great team of people. I also feel a bit safer.

We cut the cable cord and went with live streaming through Roku and DirectTV Now. We still aren't so sure about it since reception isn't consistent. I just need time to talk to AT&T and see what else we can do to get better reception. But the bill is a whole lot less and that makes me happy.

I managed to reconnect with some old classmates from way, way back. It's funny how much you learn about people you thought you already knew.

Well, this evening has a full moon shining down upon us with frigid temperatures that will continue into the coming week. We are blessed to have a warm home, food on the table, jobs (even if the pay stinks) and each other.

Wishing everyone blessings for 2018!

My Silence Has Not Been Golden

I have not been sleeping well. Not for quite a long time. What is keeping me up? Well, I'll share that with you.

• Racial tensions and violence. What is happening to us? Why are we attacking one another? I had hoped after all this time, we had progressed as a civilized society where we talk out our problems and law makers create laws that enforce civility and fair rule of law.

• Looming nuclear war with Korea. Someone really needs to grab that sawed-off runt by the scruff and take away his toys. And someone needs to do the same to Trump.

• Is our free press being fair and balanced? No publication is perfect, but could certain media outlets be stirring the pot? Who do we trust?

• Will we wake up one morning and find ourselves no longer Americans, but Russians?

On the personal side, I have had to deal with changes in my job, my husband's downward spiral health issues, finances that only seem to get worse each day, and an increasing sense of hopelessness. Hence, my silence.

Everyday, I try to keep up with the news. Our sitting President, whom I refuse to address as such, appears bent on destroying our democracy. He is in deep with Russian interests and has recently shown a mental alignment with far-right ideologies supported by white supremacists and neo-Nazi's. Turns out, these people are a big part of his voter base. This is extremely frightening to me. Everyday, I ask, "How did this monster get into our White House?"

Thanks to social media, hate and vitriol are vomited by the minute. The anonymity of the keyboard give voice to the most ugly, cruel, vicious commentary. Things we wouldn't or shouldn't say to another person's face, are expressed online. The results are often tragic and violent.

A free press is vital to a free people. Too much power in too few hands is a recipe for disaster and our founding fathers knew this. They set up a government with three independent branches and created a Constitution that would not only protect our freedoms but grow as our country grows. Yes, there have been many stumbles and mistakes, but we should learn from these mistakes and correct them. Our press is no different. However, I want to beg our journalistic community to please report the news and the truth. I wonder if some of the divide is because the American people don't know who to believe anymore. I wonder if some of these media outlets, which are now corporate owned, are wishing for their independence back. How do we fix this? How do we report issues and events without personal or Big Boss influence? Not only is a free press our window to the world, a free press is supposed to get us talking about issues at hand. Difficult to do when someone is shouting you down.

How close are we to losing our country to a foreign enemy? Will it be a nuclear war where there are no winners or a political coup where the winner speaks Russian? Is everything our military fought and sacrificed for going out the window? Are we at the mercy of elite billionaires who only answer to greed?

I beg you, my friends, to pray and to voice your concerns to elected officials. We may be able to rescue our great country from the hands of those who wish to destroy it. But we must work together - all races, all creeds, all religions. Remember, "A house divided against itself cannot stand." (The Gospel of St. Mark, and borrowed by the late President Abraham Lincoln)

Joseph Stiglitz and the Future of Our Country

Earlier this month, I stumbled across a book in the library, "The Price of Inequality - How Today's Divided Society Endangers our Future" by Joseph E. Stiglitz. His book addresses the political and economic inequalities that are present in our society. A fascinating and eye-opening book, to say the least and highly recommended.

Mr. Stiglitz writes on a much higher level than most of us are accustomed to reading. Think Wall Street Journal level of reading. This only makes sense when you realize that he is a Nobel prize winning economist and former chief economist of the World Bank. I found that I had to read his book in short spurts and sometimes reread certain paragraphs to better understand what he was saying. Not that I'm a moron, but because economics and government policy have never been a strong suit for me. However, I was surprised that Mr. Stiglitz pointed out the very things that I have experienced and witnessed myself. I was relieved to find that I'm not crazy nor a whiny crybaby. The bulk of his book carefully points out how our democracy has gradually become a country for the 1 percent and not for all the rest.

Here's the scary part - the book was published in 2012. He accurately predicted the 2016 election. I have only gotten about halfway through the book, but I had to put it down. Twice today, I broke down and cried. The hopelessness and despair just took over and my husband insisted that I stop reading.

Skipping the rest, I went to the last chapter where Mr. Stiglitz offers a path to hope. Much of these ideas are being bandied about in Congress as we speak, but with a predominately Republican Congress and a wealthy Republican President, there isn't much hope of change.

Last week we witnessed the failure to vote on a bill to repeal and replace the Affordable Care Act. While I was among the many who praised this failure, I am fearful of what will come next. Our Republican leaders have shown their hand. They do not care about the 99 percent. They only care about themselves and their wealthy friends. Any policy they dream up will not help our country in the least. As American citizens, it is incumbent upon us to rally, just as we did these last few weeks, and remind these "leaders" of who they truly work for.

Public policy, governance, and economics can be about as exciting as watching grass grow. However, we have all grown lazy and have handed over our voices to the few who aren't the least bit interested in what's good for everyone else.

Many have started a "resistance" and the numbers are growing. A few news reports have come out stating how some Trump supporters are now being hurt by the policies they voted for. "Told ya, moron," doesn't invite open discussion of ideas. Finding common ground now is more difficult than ever.

We must reach out to one another. We must find that common ground and talk as civilized adults. We must listen to each other and come up with ideas that may bring about the change we need to save our country. We are on the precipice and our future is in peril.

I am imploring you, my readers, and your friends, to please contact your government leaders - local and national - regarding any concerns you have. You don't like the proposed tax reform? Speak up! You don't like the municipal codes regarding doggie do-do? Speak up! Please, please, please don't sit back and do nothing. It's hard work getting involved in your community, state, or federal government, but we must take action. Wall Street walked off with my $20,000 401K retirement fund and I'll never see that again. I know for certain that I'm not alone and neither are you.

Desecrating A Cemetery - Not Funny

This past weekend, a group of unknown individuals entered the Chesed Shel Emeth Cemetery and knocked over roughly 200 headstones. This beautiful cemetery, located at the corner of Hanley and Olive, has been around since the late 1890's.While the police are not yet calling this a hate crime, I have a hard time believing it is the act of a bunch of bored punks. I've heard of kids pulling this kind of thing on a few headstones, but not this many. The Jewish community is outraged. We should all be outraged.

Within hours of the breaking news, the local Muslim community reached out to their Jewish neighbors and offered help. In a span of three hours, the Muslim community raised over $25,000 to help with repair and clean up costs. Local volunteers of all faiths gathered at the cemetery today to offer help with the clean up.

Now, I hope everyone is listening to this: 

THIS IS WHAT COMMUNITY IS ALL ABOUT!!!

My co-worker and friend, Mrs. H, told me she has family buried in that cemetery. She doesn't yet know if their stones are damaged. Up until today, no one but cemetery employees were allowed in the cemetery to review the damage. Local rabbis are notifying families as soon as they know anything.

Neighbors helping one another through kindness and sharing. Why are we so engulfed in mistrust and vitriol? Bury the hate and come together as a community. This is not a difficult concept.

Mrs. H and I discussed this heinous act at length today. She wondered out loud if she should continue to wear her religious medals in public. I was stunned that she felt fearful for her safety. I told her to continue to wear them - they help define who she is. She is proud of her Jewish heritage and I believe it's disgraceful that some ignorant &*$%* would make her consider hiding the very thing that makes her who she is. So, in solidarity with my Jewish brothers and sisters, I have put on my crucifix and St. Gabriel medal. I haven't worn them lately because the chain broke. However, I found another chain (it doesn't match the pendants) and I'm wearing my own religious medals proudly.

I hope the police catch the people responsible for this and I truly hope the punishment fits the crime. Clean up the mess without mechanical help. What? You can't lift a 1,000 pound headstone? Too bad that didn't occur to you when you knocked it over!

The President's tepid and delayed response was and is inexcusable. It was nice that the Vice President stopped by since he was in town for something else anyway. He and our Governor rolled up their sleeves, put on gloves and helped with some of the clean up. 

However, it will eventually be up to all of us to send the strong message that hate crimes will not be tolerated by anyone. Here or anywhere.

May God Bless us all.

You Go, Girl!

I am so proud of all my sisters (and brothers) today. No, I don't have any biological siblings. I'm referring to my fellow women who marched in cities all over the country to protest our newly sworn-in President, Donald J. Trump.

Yes, This is how democracy works.

The protests were peaceful and massive. The crowds in Chicago and Washington DC were so large that the parades/marches had to be cancelled. But the protests went on without the marching.

Signs proclaiming the many issues we are all fighting, songs, and chants filled the TV and computer screens all day. The sight was glorious. I wish I could have been there. I had to work today, but I was with my sisters in spirit.

Even if I had today off from work, I'm not sure if I could have endured the crowds of people in downtown St. Louis or, especially, Washington DC. According to news sources, roughly 20,000 people showed up to march in St. Louis and about 500,000 people descended on Washington DC. Not sure of the numbers for Chicago. However, I will add my voice to the many. I will do this with my writing - really the only way I know how.

• I will do my best to address issues of discrimination. Some I know better than others, so I will look to my readers to guide me in painting an accurate picture of discrimination where I lack knowledge or experience.
• I will do my best to raise awareness of social issues. Education, health, crime, homelessness, and anything else that may cross my path in the next four years. 
• A free and independent press is the cornerstone of our democracy and this should be cherished, protected, and held to a very high standard. I will do my best, when I am reporting on anything, to do so from an ethical journalistic standpoint. 
• I want to encourage conversation. This blog is called Kitchen Table Talk because I enjoy talking over a cup of coffee at the kitchen table. Please join me and we can learn from each other. A plus - I don't have to wash dishes!

There is no telling what our future holds. But, together, we can make tomorrow better than today.

God Bless America.

A Lesson Still Being Learned

I made a mistake today. Kind of a big one. And it's not the first time I've made this mistake. And I'm not the only person who has made this mistake before. Sadly, we are all guilty of this mistake. What's so aggravating is that I keep making this mistake. We all do.

The mistake is thinking that my problems are unique to me. Only me. No one else has my problems. I'm the exception. You can't possibly know what my problems are like.

While it's true that we can never know fully what another person is going through in life. "Walk a mile in my shoes," is often the mantra. None of us can know fully what another person's problems are. However, many problems are shared by many. Difficulty in paying bills, job troubles, marriage or relationship troubles, loneliness, health issues. The list goes on.

Previously, I discussed the issue of age discrimination. My question has been and is, "When did we become invisible? When did we become irrelevant?" I let my frustration upset me to the point of tears. For two days. My husband and son were ready to race me to the hospital for depression. Today, I woke up a bit better, but the situation hasn't changed.

At work today, I mentioned age discrimination with a co-worker, an African-American woman close to my age and, certainly, much wiser than me. She simply looked at me and told me that black men face discrimination and much worse on a daily basis. Being a white woman, she gently reminded me, I don't understand that the black community has been dealing with discrimination far longer. As she was speaking to me, I found myself resenting her statement. But this is age discrimination, not racial discrimination, I thought to myself. Why wouldn't she just let me vent? I can't pay my bills. Retirement dreams have long vanished. I'm not talking about skin color. I'm talking about feeling invisible.

Then, it hit me like a ton of bricks. Discrimination, on any basis, is discrimination. Feelings of hopelessness, being useless, tired of pounding your head against a wall - all of that plays into any kind of discrimination. "You can't be here because you're different." It doesn't matter if the difference is age, gender, skin color, religion, nationality, sexual orientation, or disability.

In an era of greater access to information, why is discrimination still so prevalent? Why is "different" still perceived as a threat?

Clearly, I have a lot to learn. But, then, don't we all.

This Election

I won't lie.

I'm completely and totally numb.

Graveyards must be rumbling with deceased presidents spinning in their graves. John Adams must be screaming now. Thank God my parents aren't alive to see this.

I've always considered myself smack in the center of political philosophies. I'm conservative on some issues and liberal on others.

Now what do we do? Our 45th President is an orange-faced orangutan. I hate to believe that my neighbors voted based on fear. Both parties were guilty of playing the End-of-the-World card, but why did we fall for it?

Well, the damage has been done. Stock markets are crashing. My pitiful retirement fund that Macy's started to build for me is gone. Again. The Republican Party has retained control of the Senate and the House and will continue to play games with our lives. Welcome to the new world order, folks.

However, does this have to be our future? I've written here before about working together to solve our own problems. Sadly, some of my audience took that to be a "woe is me" session rather than an opportunity to put ideas together and think of solutions.

WE are the people. Trump and Pence do not represent me. Nor do they want to represent me.

Please, God, Bless our country.

We Just Watched History Last Night

Ordinarily, I only watch the World Series if my beloved Cardinals are playing. So, yes, I was disappointed that the Cardinals didn't make it to the series. At the same time, though, I thought I was hearing things when I found out the Cubs made it to the series. Wait a minute, are you kidding me? The Cubs? Come on. And even if they got that far, they will flounder. They usually do. Nah.

Life around here kept me too busy to really keep up with the series until last night. Then, I remembered that it was the last game. We turned on the game long about the end of the 6th inning. Cubs leading 6 to 3. You're kidding me! We were glued to the TV at this point. Big Jack was rooting for the Indians while my son and I were rooting for the Cubs. A divided house, but that's nothing new.



As I watched, it looked like the Cubs were starting to falter a bit. Of course, they were a case of nerves. Haven't been this far in over 100 years. Can they do it? Eighth inning - Indians batted home three runs and tied the game. Can you say apoplexy? Ninth inning - game still tied and then a rain delay. It felt as if God was torturing all of us. Tenth inning and Cubs score a run. Oh. My. Word. If they can just hold off the Indians. Three outs later and the Cubs are, we can say it now, World Series Champions.

A streak of lightning flashed outside my window right as the third out happened.

Jack flew out of his chair, I started screaming, and Big Jack pulled his Mizzou ball cap over his head and pretended to weep.

What a game.

Let's see just how different the world is from the last Cubs championship. We had just begun the 20th Century. The automobile, bicycles, electricity, indoor plumbing, and telephones were new and gaining popularity. Women would finally get to vote; civil rights would begin the process of leveling the social field for all, Two world wars and The Great Depression weren't even a thought. Vaccines would come to save millions of lives. Radio and television would become the new medium of communication and entertainment.

In the last 108 years, man has walked on the moon, explored deep space, and discovered things that were only thought about in science fiction stories. We have computers in our offices, homes, and even in our watches and cell phones. We voted in our first black President, and next week will determine if we have our first woman President.

My dear Cubbies, you have earned this championship and deserve all the glow that goes with it. The Cleveland Indians put up a good fight, but it just wasn't their time. That's okay. There's always next year.

Congratulations to all of you. Enjoy the cheers from Cardinals fans, because next spring, we'll deny all of it.

Dear America

Tonight I watched the second debate between two people who want to be our next President. I will make no secret that I will not vote for the Republican candidate under any circumstances; however, I'm not crazy about the Democratic candidate, either.

The debate gave me a blinding headache that only a strong pain killer can take away. That said, I want to express my thoughts before I succumb to the wonderful world of sleep.

This election year has been one of the most divisive I have ever experienced in my memory. I probably could dredge up presidential runs in our pre-television history and find some that could have been worse. Andrew Jackson comes to mind - his run for office was more than his wife could handle and she died from the stress. Jackson never got over it. Of course, Jackson was also a horse's ass, but I digress.

Our country is angry. We have a Congress that is holding our country hostage while they play games with our laws. Open debate on issues can't happen with the mind-set of certain party members "My way or you're wrong."

Our country is starved for work. Jobs are scarce and the ones that are available are only available to a select few. Discrimination is a real thing, by the way. Wages are stagnant and the work world has been turned upside down. Jobs once slated for high school and college students are now held by single parents and/or older workers who can't find work elsewhere. The young college graduates are getting jobs that require the experience and wisdom of older workers, but they are willing to work for less and companies are snapping them up.

Our country is frightened. Which mall will host the next blood bath? Which public venue will literally go out with a bang? Guns in the classroom? Are you serious? Sick people dressed as clowns terrorizing children and communities. What is going on here?

Our country is stressed to the breaking point. We can't meet our bills. The Affordable Care Act is skyrocketing out of control and coverage is dimming. Yes, prices at the gas pump are going down, but utilities are going up. The housing marketing is making a rebound, but many communities are still feeling the pain of the housing market crash.

Tonight the world watched St. Louis host the Presidential debate. And, for a change, we showed the world what we are really made of. A peaceful demonstration paraded through Delmar all the way to Washington University. Many issues were represented, but no violence. No one got hurt. But voices were loud and clear.

We need to come together like this again. We need to express our concerns. I believe each of us has the power to turn this country around. We have the ability to fix these problems and we have the ability to put the right people in government who will hear our voices, and help us fix these problems.

America, I'm scared for our future. But, I'm also hopeful that we can fix what is broken. I believe it all begins in the voting booth.

Thank you.