Introducing . . . . Miss Octane

Never in my life would I have thought I would write anything praising a creature I have long feared. I truly love a lot of animals - dogs, cats, horses, gerbils, hamsters, and all baby critters in the zoo. I could probably get used to frogs and lizards, but it would be a stretch. However, as far as dogs are concerned, there are three breeds that always frightened me almost to a panic-stricken paralysis. Those three have been Rottweilers, Dobermans, and Pit Bulls. I have known people who have owned each of these dogs and they have always sworn to the breed's gentle nature, "just a big couch potato," and anything else to convince me that I'm buying into a myth. Of course, this argument loses a lot of steam when at a later time, the dog in question has to be put down because it got loose and bit someone. Hmm, yea, I'm really convinced now.

However, a few weeks ago, I met a lovely young puppy of about 8 months old and her name is Octane. Miss Octane is a pure bred Pit Bull Terrier. Her owners are our neighbors and they, wait for it, swear to the pit bull breed's gentle nature and that some people just don't treat these dogs right. Yea, I know better, right?

The first time I came over to their house since they got the dog, I was braced for angry barking (pit bulls are territorial dogs by nature and breeding) and expecting my neighbor to wrestle with the dog to keep it from lunging at me. Not the case at all. I walked through the door and was immediately greeted by a beautiful tan dog with a white chest who calmly walked up to me, sniffed my fingers and looked up at me with soulful brown eyes. Her expression was all puppy, "will you play with me?" She uttered no sound at all - not even a growl. After she gave all my fingers a thorough sniff, she proceeded to lick my hands and then moved to sniff a few other areas that all dogs like to sniff (never mind where). I couldn't believe what I saw. Octane decided that I needed a more proper greeting and jumped up on me to say hello. Standing on her hind legs, she came about even with my chin. (I'm 5'3" tall or short.)

I bravely scratched her behind her soft, velvety ears and we became instant friends. She loved having her chin rubbed and laid down on the couch for a tummy rub. As my neighbor and I visited, I watched Octane and how she interacted with my daughter who was already there hanging out with a friend. My daughter knew not to take off her shoes for a good reason - Octane likes to chew on bare feet. She also likes shoes, but apparently bare feet are more fun. 

When the princess would get off the couch, she would do it in phases. She would lift her upper part of her body and place her front paws on the floor, stretching out as far as she could go without having to move the lower half of her body from its original place on the couch. Octane is also very effective in letting you know when she wants attention. She jumps on your lap and pushes you out of your seat. She also puts her big head in your lap - a huge surprise for a breed known for fighting.

Octane is still a baby, but she has already won over my heart. I don't know if she is truly an example of the real nature of pit bulls or if she's just a very submissive personality; but I told her that she's giving pit bulls a bad rep. I don't think of her as a pit bull - she's a pit diva. And I think she knows it too.

I'm still afraid of pit bulls as a breed; however, Octane is too sweet to be feared. For more information on pit bulls, visit United Kennel Club's web site - http://www.ukcdogs.com/WebSite.nsf/Breeds/AmericanPitBullTerrierRevisedNovember12008

Reflections

There are many milestones in a child's life that remind the parents that their baby is growing up: rolling over, walking, riding a bike without training wheels, first day of school, first date, and the chiller - learning how to drive.

This weekend I took some time to teach both my kids how to drive. My 19-year-old son is taking his time with this and I really should be thankful. The insurance costs would have killed me if his driving didn't. My 15-year-old daughter is more than ready and has been backing the car down the driveway for almost a year now. She keeps pushing the line by edging the van closer and closer to the street.

Our first foray into the world of automotive independence was a good one. While both kids joked around about wanting to zoom down the empty Northwest Plaza parking lot at 80 miles per hour, spinning donuts and trying to run over each other, they did very well. I really believe they both will be very responsible drivers. Of course, I still have to restart my heart whenever Sami says, "10 points for every pedestrian I hit!"

Crab Grass

No one can look at my front yard and exclaim, "Oh my, I saw that yard in Better Homes and Gardens!" In fact, I'm pretty sure that if I even suggested my yard be featured in any magazine, it might be Better Weeds and Dumpsites. I never claimed to be a gardener, even when I actually try. I really admire those dedicated gardeners who cultivate an oasis around their homes. Gardening is truly a talent.

Today I was weeding my weed garden which had successfully choked out any sign of floral life that Jack and I placed in it this past spring. The crab grass has literally taken over my pink iris to the point you can't even find the iris leaves. When I pull on a vine of this nasty stuff, it keeps going for about one or two feet before it finally breaks. It has so entwined itself with my moss rose plants, that I can't pull out the crab grass without taking the moss rose with it.

Crab grass, known in botany circles as digitaria, is actually found in most areas of the world. I don't think it's growing in the Arctic Circle, though. I really do believe that crab grass is more than just a weed. It's the curse of the Devil. Call me crazy, but who else could come up with something that is almost impossible to kill, keeps growing no matter what the weather (drought kills everything else but this stuff), and seems to have no pests to feed on it? I've pulled out enough of this stuff to wrap around the world twice!

Sometimes I come across a sprout of crab grass and start to pull on it. It won't budge. I often wonder how deep these roots go. From what I have found, the roots are rather shallow. I really don't believe this. I, frankly, believe the roots go straight to the other side of the world. There is probably some poor farmer pulling on the same crab grass weed that I am and we are having a tug of war.

Some scientists predict that roaches will survive a nuclear holocaust. I think we should add crab grass to this list too.

A Message for My Readers

I've been told that my blog is revealing too much information about my family and events that I thought would be okay to share. Since this is creating problems within my family, I will no longer blog like I have before. I'll still post things out here, but not in the depth I have in the past.

I always review my content with family members before I post, but apparently, this isn't enough. Therefore, until I can find something to talk about that won't offend anyone, I won't be posting for awhile.

I hope you have enjoyed my previous blogs - my goal has always been to inform and entertain. I'm very proud of my family - that's why I talk about them. My wish has been to have my readers enjoy my family as much as I do.

Thank you.

Wrapping Up Summer 2010

Wow! This summer has zipped by faster than any I can remember. Maybe because my kids didn't have time to be bored. Maybe because I was so busy I didn't have time to notice any boredom. Whatever. Tomorrow marks the first day of school for Ritenour students and I'm relieved. Now the days will have more structure and less "fly by the seat of my pants" feel to them.

Jack didn't do much this summer. He is now officially accepted at Florissant Valley Community College and will finally begin his degree program in computer engineering. He's taking baby steps to this, but it beats sitting in his room all the time playing video games.

Sami, on the other hand, kept me so busy that I barely had time to see my husband and son. She finished summer school with passing grades and went directly into Color Guard practice. We just found out that Ritenour band and color guard have been invited to march in next year's Memorial Day parade in Washington DC. So now the intense fund raising efforts begin. Sami needs $650 to be able to go and we don't have the money. They have already had two car washes and haven't raised a tremendous amount. They will be having pizza sales later and that promises to be a big draw. In the meantime, Sami is looking for odd jobs to bring in money. She has spent the summer walking a dog for an elderly lady and also helping clean her house.

Girl Scout Gold Award Update

It looks like Sami will be painting a mural on the wall of a building located in downtown Overland to be a scenic backdrop for the newly built Erickson Plaza. Ritenour art students are supposed to help with this project, but Sami needs to submit drawings to the art teacher in charge. She also has to present these ideas to the mayor and Overland Business Association. Pretty intimidating, but I know she can do it. Another girl in her troop will be taking an adjacent wall for her Gold Award project as well. Hopefully, the girls will be in sync with their drawings. The whole project is pretty daunting.

Will post updates as the project comes along.


Summer 2010 - Part 2

Sami made a new friend this summer. Well, actually, they have known each other since Sami started dating Trent. The girl is one of Trent's sisters. Tonya came to St. Louis to visit with her dad and I took the girls out to the Butterfly House and the Magic House. They both had a ball. Any awkward feelings between them (Sami and Trent are no longer dating) vanished when they went into the Magic House. I never saw two girls have more fun. Sami had a few "Lucy" moments (Lucy Ricardo of "I Love Lucy") like crashing into a mirrored wall in a funhouse maze and pressing her face into a peg board only to have her upper torso also press through to the other side.

On the way to the Magic House, I took the girls to Kirkwood Farmer's Market to look at the fresh boys, um, produce. Yea, produce, not boys. Produce.

I'm not sure how long this friendship will last since Tonya lives with her mom in Oregon, but they seem to get along great and Tonya is such a terrific girl. Only time will tell if this friendship is meant to be.

Wave goodbye to Summer 2010 and say hello to a new school year. Hope Sami and Jack make it a good one.

Parental Outrage

There are some things that happen in this world that just shouldn't happen. Things that defy logic sometimes and leave one wondering, "what is going on in that person's mind?"

This past weekend, one of Sami's friends (and someone she values as a sister) was physically assaulted by her boyfriend. This cretin began with making insipid demands on her, then insulted her, then proceeded to strangle her and punched her in her pelvis when she tried to defend herself by kicking him in his private area. The girl was injured badly enough to be rushed to the hospital where she was treated for deep bruises to her vaginal area.

Here is where the story sounds sooooo familiar. She "loves" him and refuses to press assault and battery charges on him. The guy took off to Winfield to cool off and the next day, the girl drove up to Winfield to pick him up at a friend's house after he apologized tearfully and told her how much he loves her and it won't happen again.

This is also where Sami's safety was compromised. This girl, on the promise to Sami to spend quality time together and go out for a drive, took her all the way out to Winfield without bothering to tell Sami or anyone else where they were going. Sami was a little frightened because she didn't know where she was and couldn't contact me without alerting her friend. Furthermore, this girl knew that Sami was not allowed to be around this monster nor the friend he was with. Winfield is an hour's drive away, so Sami was no longer in control of her environment and safety. A very frightening scenario.

My anger has many facets right now. I would like to take that monster boyfriend and string him up by his privates over a pool of hungry crocodiles. However, crocodiles are endangered and I don't want to harm them with garbage. Therefore, let's stake him out over a very large ant hill inhabited with swarms of fire ants. Might need to take him to Texas for that, but I'm cool with it.

I'm also angry with Sami's friend for allowing herself to be so manipulated by this guy. Everyone has been telling her to get rid of him, that things will only get worse. Apparently, he has tried to strangle her before and she never told anyone. In addition, she expected Sami to lie for her and cover her actions. AND, she betrayed my trust in her to watch over my 15 year old child while they were out. When I texted her and told her of my upset and sense of betrayal, she lied to me and then brushed me off with a flip, "Whatever." She also betrayed Sami's trust by not telling her exactly where they were going until they were half way to Winfield. As a result of this excursion, Sami is forbidden from going anywhere with this girl unless either her mom or I are present. Sami is not the one in trouble, this girl is.

At the risk of sounding unChristian and cold-hearted, I'm really getting tired of this girl dragging us into her drama. She upsets her mother so badly that the poor woman sobs while at work. The mom calls me in tears and manages to choke out the latest outrage. I'm at a loss as to how to counsel her. My heart breaks for her - her daughter is her only child - and like most parents, she has big dreams for her. So do I for my kids. No parent should watch her child make these kinds of decisions and be abused, but that is what this woman is dealing with. Sami's friend doesn't realize how her actions literally paralyze those who care for her - including us. I'm to the point that I can't do any work unless Sami is in school. When she's home, she's running out the door and I'm chasing after her.

I keep praying that this girl will straighten up and fly right, but we all have heard the unhappy endings to these abuse situations. I truly hope this isn't her future. I'm asking all my readers who believe in prayer to please pray for this girl and for Sami. This is no example for Sami to have, although, she sees the abuse and knows it's unacceptable.

Sami's Girl Scout Gold Award - The Process Begins . . .

Sami's status as a 15-year-old is getting rather confusing. She is a freshman in high school, but a senior in Girl Scouts. She's also approaching young womanhood and leaving her girlhood behind, so is she really a Girl Scout or a Young Lady Scout? Okay, maybe I'm nitpicking here.

One of the things that the young ladies in Girl Scouts work on is the Girl Scout Gold Award. This is the highest award and honor that a Girl Scout can earn. She must be at least 15 and a registered Girl Scout, and, I think, have earned her Silver Award. Sami seamlessly earned her Silver Award last year with her previous troop working on a bird sanctuary in one of the Girl Scout camps. It was lovely and all the girls worked hard on it.

The Gold Award is going to be a completely different story. I promised Sami I would chronicle her progress here on my blog, so prepare to be entertained (I hope).

A few weeks ago, she and I attended the Gold Award workshop to learn how she should go about earning this award. The three-hour workshop was the most grueling session I have ever attended. I'm sure the ladies who put together the presentation put a lot of thought into it, but really, they made it more complicated than it needed to be. Sami was so overwhelmed, she broke down and cried.

The seminar started out pleasantly enough. The girls each found their seats after registering, some of them from the same troop. Sami was the only one from her troop, so she didn't know anyone there. That's never a problem for Sami, as my family and friends all know. Before long, she was chatting it up with the two other girls at her table as though she had known them her whole life - Yep, that's my girl. She must get it from her Irish ancestors.

The presenters were two women who, near as I could tell, must have never given a presentation before. Please forgive my business snobbery here, but I've done enough presentations to recognize a newbie. These ladies not only bounced around in the slide show, thus losing most of us adults in the back of the room, they bounced around in their lecture as well. One Girl Scout leader sitting next to me quickly gave up trying to take notes and looked very frustrated.

Midway through the presentation, they had an icebreaker. Why they waited until this point to do this is anyone's guess. Sami enjoyed the icebreaker and at that time, traded e-mails and phone numbers with her table partners. (Her Irish grandfather would have been so proud.)

The rest of the session was more confusing with each slide and this was when Sami broke down and cried. Not hysterical sobbing - that's not Sami's way, but quiet tears rolling down her cheeks. No one stepped forward to help her calm down until break time when I went to her to see if she was okay. I knew she needed help and I asked one of the presenters if Sami could just have a printout of the slide show. They said she had all the information in her possession and didn't need the slides. Trying to calm her down, I whispered to her that I would go over everything when we got home. I was thinking that passing the health care reform bill in Congress would be easier than this mess.

When we got home, Sami put down all the material she gathered from the workshop and just walked away from it. I think if it spontaneously combusted, she wouldn't be upset. A few days later I reviewed the material and placed an call to her Scout leader. The two of us talked about what her first step should be and we boiled down everything to more manageable steps for her. We found that this process wasn't as bad as presented and if Sami stayed focused on the small, baby steps, she could get it accomplished without too much trouble. Her leader pointed out to her that she already began several of the steps without even knowing it. We assured her that all was going to be okay.

She feels better about this now and began discussing ideas for her project just the other day. I think we have begun.

High School, Special Needs Students, and Winning a Game

Recently, media sports departments across St. Louis have been heralding the unbelievable winning shot by a special school district student at a Kirkwood High School basketball game. Now this story grabs my attention on several levels - let me explain.

Kirkwood High School is my alma mater - I'm class of 1980 - so, of course, I'm proud that Kirkwood had a good game. It's great that this young man's shot won the game - no doubt. I think it's wonderful that Kirkwood and the basketball team welcomed and nurtured this young man to realize his dream. This brings tears to my eyes and makes me believe that there are good people out there - especially in my old high school. The news media hasn't really mentioned David Stillman's special needs; there really isn't any reason to. David clearly had all the support and then some to overcome whatever those needs were. His family and teammates are all very proud of him - and they should be.

My son has Aspbergers Syndrome. When he entered Ritenour, he wanted to try out for the swim team. The athletic director encouraged it. I spoke to the swim coach who also encouraged Jack to try out. While Jack is socially awkward out of the water, in the water he is a totally different kid. Or at least he used to be. He tried for a week to pass all the tests for the team and didn't make it. A couple of the boys teased him. The coach pretty much informed me that she didn't have time for him. The other members of the team seemed supportive but nothing much more came of it. Jack never went back. I placed him in classes at a public pool in St. Ann, hoping to improve his strength, stamina and confidence. The instructors there didn't want to waste their time with him either. Jack has never been back to a pool since.

I hope the Stillman family knows just how fortunate they are to have such a supportive environment for David. This young man will always treasure his great accomplishment for the rest of his life. I wish I could say the same for Jack. I don't know why Ritenour would not help him more. Kirkwood is a wealthier school district than Ritenour, but that's no excuse to discourage the efforts of a special needs child. Jack just wanted to be a part of something and was denied the chance. David became a part of Kirkwood history because someone gave him a chance.

Congratulations David on a great game.