Note to Parents: You are appreciated

My 12-year-old daughter talked me into taking her blackberry picking at Eckert's Orchards in Belleville, about 40 or so miles from where we live. Now, I have never eaten blackberries nor have I ever picked them. I have heard stories about the thorny bushes and the purple stains. Sounds painful and somewhat fun. Keeping the thorny bushes in mind, I warned my daughter we should wear jeans in spite of the 90-degree heat. Thusly we moved forward into the blackberry world.

Our friends at Eckert's must have had us in mind because the bushes were not thorny at all, but most of the ripe berries were rather picked over. The unripened berries were plentiful and I began to wonder if we should have waited another week.

We had a great time finding berries in obscure spots and watching the little ones wearing the fruits of their labors was amusing. One little boy complained that the red blackberries were sour. His mom just looked at him with the expression of (I told you not to eat them).

On the way home, my daughter talked about some of her school friends and how some of them only take vacations to places like Disney World or the Bahamas or outstate to visit relatives. According to her, these kids don't know how to live. Picking berries or apples or pumpkins is the life, she says. Home-made fun is the best. Wow! I guess I'm doing something right after all. Now, I need help with eight pounds of blackberries.

Turtle Porn!

The St. Louis Zoo is one of the finest zoos in the world. I take tremendous pride in being among the many parents whose children are second or third generation visitors to a local icon.

Of course, the zoo has changed over time - as it should. The presentation of the animals is more like their natural habitats and the zoo keepers are available to talk to visitors about the animals.

Since school is out for both me and my children, we decided to take a family day at the zoo. We parked about a 1/2 mile away (really!) to avoid the $10 parking fee at the lot across the entrance. Once we got in, we chose our direction and began our educational tour of the world-famous St. Louis Zoo. Did I mention this would be educational?

Not far from the entrance and across from the sea lion display (everyone's favorite) was the pen for the tortoises. I'm not sure what kind of tortoises they were because we walked upon a male tortoise trying to mate with a female. The other tortoises were discretely turned in other directions while the human horde was watching what should have been a private moment. My kids blurted out, "Oh no, turtle porn!" and "Mom, I didn't know turtles made noise." The male tortoise was moaning and groaning quite loudly. My kids took pictures of the spectacle and I hope I don't get a call from Division of Family Services for their photographic efforts. This tortoise could be heard from several hundred yards away. My son told me he is scarred for life now. He may well be, because any time I say "turtle porn" to him, he starts laughing and blushing.

We wandered around at other exhibits - the prairie dogs and their babies could keep us entertained all day, two newly dropped camel calves were lounging beside their mothers, the Asian elephants would not let anyone see the new baby elephant, and the young giraffe thought all the humans were the most ridiculous things he had ever seen.

The Jungle of the Apes was being renovated and all the apes were placed in outside exhibits. We arrived in time for the silver-backed gorilla to receive his lunch. He sat on the hillside and carefully ate his meal of honey rice and apricots and once he finished, he glared at the assembled human audience, turned his back on us and stalked off to another part of the exhibit.

We finally worked our way over to the Fragile Forest exhibit which had the chimpanzees and orangutans. Love must have been in the air because we witnessed a male chimp trying to convince a female chimp that he was in the mood. My son, once again, is scarred for life.

After a few more exhibits where we didn't see any more amorous animal adventures, we headed back towards the entrance where we began our day. Along the way, a peacock was chasing after a pea hen and they both were looking for a little privacy.

The zoo is definitely a family place - procreationally speaking.

Imus' Remarks are Reprehensible

Recently, Time Magazine had an article about freedom of speech and the debate of why its acceptable to use racial slurs in music but not in public forum such as a radio show. To this and the nationwide debate, I would like to add my thoughts.

Racial slurs are unacceptable. Period. Derogatory remarks about a person's nationality, gender, or any other difference are just plain mean and cruel. We are ALL God's children and He made us different yet in His own image so that we can love one another as He loves us. I can't explain why this is so, but it just is and I'm accepting it on FAITH.

Remarks against Jews by so-called Christians never fails to slay me. HELLO! Do I need to remind you that the Man who died on the cross for YOUR SINS was a Jewish man raised by Jewish parents in a Jewish society that was being maligned by the Romans?

Remarks against African Americans are equally ridiculous. How many of our white and black ancestors died so that today's African Americans can have the same freedoms that everyone else has? Those girls on the Rutgers basketball team would not be there if it weren't for a lot of very brave black and white people standing up for something that is right. By the way, my congratulations to the girls on that basketball team - you all showed a lot of class and we should all be very proud of you.

The misguided adults that make these terrible remarks and their employers who allow such behavior to continue or encourage such behavior have forgotten the basic rules of sandbox etiquette - no name calling and no throwing sand. If a 5-year-old can get it, why can't you?

As for the musicians who seem to get away with racial slurs in their songs, I don't understand this one. But I think they would understand it in their wallets if people would just refuse to buy or listen to their music. Historically, music has always been on the edge of social change and maybe that is what is happening here. Looks to me like we are going backwards, folks.

Name calling for any reason is wrong. Shock value is fun - I've pulled it a few times, but never at the expense of something that another person cannot change. This debate is more than freedom of speech, it should be about common sense. Imus should be removed from the airwaves simply because he doesn't seem to exercise common sense.

The Big Flap About the Super Bowl Ads

While I'm not a football fan, I can recognize a touchdown when I see one. I can also recognize a fumble - sometimes. That said, I did my annual viewing of the only football game I bother with - Super Bowl. It all began, really, when the Rams, our home team, made it to the Super Bowl a few years ago.

Now that I'm in school studying advertising and marketing, I watch Super Bowl commercials as a homework assignment. With the exception of the Streaking Sheep ad from Anheuser-Busch, most of last year's ads were forgotten by my family. This year's selection really didn't do much for us, except for a few.

- The Manly Snickers ad. I used to eat Snickers every day for years. Dental problems made me put my favorite candy bar on hold. After this ad, I won't eat another Snickers bar ever again.

- The Blockbuster Mouse ad. What is the big deal with this commercial? These animals are not real! They are computer generated images. No animals got hurt during the making of this commercial, so get over it. No one is grieving over the Roadrunner and Wylie Coyote going over a cliff with an anvil right behind them. Same thing - different critters. I found the commercial hysterical.

- Kevin Federline fast food ad. Somebody, please tell this guy to go away.

- Chevy Naked Guys Car Wash ad. My kids freaked out over this ad and I still laugh uncontrollably over it. My daughter insists that she is scarred for life because of the naked old man. I still think it's funny.

These are just a few of the commercials that come to mind. The others really weren't much to notice. Even the Anheuser-Busch ads weren't much this year. It's a shame, because I miss those Clydesdales and the naked sheep.

Congratulations to the Colts for winning the big game!

A Sense of Reality or Not

It's funny how ringing in the new year always makes us look at ourselves and the world around us a little differently. Okay, only for a few minutes and then we go back to our usual stuff.

However, it is worth taking a few minutes to think about what we as the general public consider important in our lives. Newspaper tabloids are filled with such nonsense news as Angelina Jolie's possible baby bump, Jennifer Aniston announcing she is ready to see Brad's baby, the list just goes on. Do I really care if Angelina is pregnant again? Not really, although it would be nice if she and Brad would quit making babies and make their relationship legal and permanent. (Hollywood's definition of permanent varies depending upon the career mobility of the persons involved.) Why does Jennifer have to announce she is ready to see Brad's baby? That seems pretty personal to me, don't you think?

While we are given moment by moment updates on Hollywood's sleeping arrangements, the general public is still in the dark about the harsh realities that are happening around us: the heinous conflicts in places like Darfur and Somalia, polar bears drowning in the North Pole, and people begging in the streets here in the United States (the richest country in the world, right?).

This is all pretty heavy duty stuff and hard to take in huge doses. I believe that because the mindless slaughter in far away countries doesn't get as much attention as Owen and Kate's break up is because we feel overwhelmed by the violence and helpless to do anything about it. I have asked myself what could I do to help? Unfortunately, nothing other than prayer comes to mind. I'm not putting down the power of prayer - Jesus said to the apostles that if you have faith even like a mustard seed, you will say to this mulberry tree, 'Be uprooted and be planted in the sea,' and it will obey you.

When mega-stars break up, you know they will each pick up the pieces and get on with their lives. When defenseless women are raped and murdered just because they belong to a particular ethnic group, we know that the survivors won't "get over it." Those people are scarred forever and there's nothing we can do about it but pray.

Maybe we should enter 2007 with less interest in movie stars' relationships and more interest in each other as fellow human beings.